Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Circumstupidity And The Comebacks I Use.

So yes, I have seen my fair share of "circumstupidity" online.  So much, in fact, that it gave me exactly what I needed for this post.  Every statement you see here in black is something I have read somewhere online.

**Sensitivity warning**  If you've circumcised your son and are not at a place yet where you can read truthful (but blunt) responses to the excuses I have heard/read people use for why they cut their sons, maybe this post isn't for you.

"I cut my son because I prefer my sexual partner to be circumcised."  
UH....WHAT?!  Unless you're planning on having sex with your own son, this makes no sense.  (And, by the way, if you're planning on having sex with your son, you're a sick freak and need to call the cops and report yourself right now.)

"If you love your son you'll circumcise him."
*Blank stare*  So...if I love him I'll let someone take him from the safety of my arms and put him in a cold plastic circumstraint in a position that hurts his back, strap his arms and legs down, fondle his penis until it is erect, then proceed to tear his foreskin from the glans, crush it, then cut it off?  Oh, and lets not forget that during this he'll be screaming and thrashing his head back and forth, or he'll go into shock and lay there un-moving.  There's no medical reason to circumcise's why no Health Organizations recommend it.  (The Canadian Pediatric Society actually point out that the risks outweigh the "potential" benefits!)  Yeah.  That's love.
I actually prefer to show my son I love him by PROTECTING him from pain.  Crazy, I know.

"You don't know what it's like to be a guy.  I'm glad I'm circumcised."
Yeah, well you don't know what it's like to be intact.  So, since you don't really have anything to compare it to, I guess you can SAY you're glad...but you can't really know, can you?  I'm sorry that choice was taken from you without your consent and now you feel the need to justify it.  And I don't need to be a guy to know that hurting babies is wrong.  I just need a soul.

"I was circumcised and I've never had a problem with it."
With what?  Your penis?  Well since about 85% of the world's men are intact, I bet we could find a pretty huge number of men who've never "had a problem" with their penis either, even when they're intact.  Should I give you a medal for washing it?  The truth is that even if you had been left intact, chances are that you would never have "had a problem with it."  And, it's easy to say you've "never had a problem" when you're a 25 yr. old man.  Get back to me when you're 40.  Sadly cut men will have lost a huge amount of sensitivity in their penis by 40 years old.  I don't think that it's a coincidence that 40% of men over 40 have erectile dysfunction.  (You can help get that sensitivity back by restoring.  You can learn more about it HERE and HERE.)

"Circumcision has kept me from getting a UTI."
Oh good.  Heaven forbid you were to have to take 10 days worth of antibiotics to clear up an infection.  It's definitely better that you had a body part amputated.  And I'm sorry, but if you can wash your genitals, chances are you would never have gotten one in the first place.  If you want that medal now, I'll go grab it.
The numbers for UTIs in boys who have not been circumcised is 1 in 100.  It is highly uncommon for boys to ever get a UTI in the first place, in the absence of an abnormality of the urinary tract.  Girls are MUCH more likely to get a UTI, and no one ever suggests we cut their genitals.   

"Women don't want a man with a flap of skin on the end of his dick."
Um...funny...I'm pretty sure that any woman that knows the function of foreskin would be pretty freakin thrilled if their man was intact.  We love our cut men for who they are, but don't think for a second that we're happy our men were strapped down and mutilated as infants.  We're not.
The penis slides in and out of it's own sheath when a man is intact.  When a man has a circumcised penis, they are going at you like a battering ram (or, as it's been referred to in the past, "jabbing at you like a broom handle").  An intact man doesn't need lube, and he doesn't need to spit in his hand.  Those are things done by cut men.  

"But circumcision prevents HIV."
Oh really?  Huh.  Amazing stuff.  Uh, NO IT DOESN'T.  Cutting 3/4 of an infant's penile skin off does NOT give it super powers.  The WHO, UNAIDS and the CDC have endorsed circumcision as HIV prevention in ADULT CONSENTING MEN who have multiple partners in HIV hot spots in AFRICA. NONE of these organizations have endorsed infant circumcision, nor are there any studies involving men circumcised as infants. There is no evidence that infant circumcision prevents HIV, quite the opposite; despite 80% of American men being circumcised at birth, HIV transmission rates are many times higher than countries in Europe and Asia where circumcision is rare.
One theory of why circumcised men are in fact more likely to spread the HIV virus is because of the lack of foreskin.  As I mentioned above, the penis of an intact man slides in and out of it's own sheath, protecting the genitals of both partners from tiny tears caused by the friction of the penis as it's rammed in and out.  An intact man does not cause that same friction.   The foreskin acts as a protective barrier to the genitals of both partners, preventing the tiny skin tears.

"A boy should look like his father."
This is my biggest pet peeve.  How can someone seriously say this with a straight face?!
Is the father of this child planning on spending a lot of time comparing penises with your son?  I'm going to assume your hubby is normal and say that's NEVER going to happen.
Are you afraid that you're son is going to see your partner naked and realize that compared to his daddy's penis, his has something extra?  Are you afraid you're going to have to explain to your son why he was left intact, while your spouse is not?  Don't worry about it.  Tell him that when your hubby was a baby, they thought it was cleaner and had to be done.  Now we know better.  We know that there are no medical reasons to do it, so you left him just as perfect as he was the day he was born.  His foreskin isn't a birth defect, and it didn't need to be removed.
I think that conversation is going to be easier than the one you're going to have if you circumcise him and he finds out that you let someone cut off the end of his penis without his consent when he was just newly born into this world.  

And here's a little more common sense...What if your spouse was missing an arm?  Should your son also have an arm removed at birth?  You want them to match, right?  What if your son is born with red hair, and your hubby is blond?  Then what?  They're not going to match.
But it's okay.  Don't panic.  Your son is NOT your partner...not only that, he's a whole separate person!  An individual.  He doesn't need to be a clone of your man to be perfect.  He was born that way...with all of his parts.  And they share DNA.  Isn't that enough?!

"I was circumcised and I don't remember it, so it's okay."
Honestly, failing to have vivid memories of an event in childhood does not mean it never happened.  At that time it is very real to that baby.  To him, it's a horrible, traumatizing event that never should have taken place.
It's harsh, but what if someone raped a coma patient?  Would it be okay because she couldn't remember it when she woke up?  NO.  Of course not.  What if someone punched that baby?  When it grows up it's not going to remember that happening.  So is it okay because the memory won't last their whole lifetime?  NO.  Of course it's not okay!!!
And it's the same with circumcision.  Failing to remember it as an adult does not excuse the fact that it was done.  It does not excuse the fact that pain was inflicted on a newborn baby.  It does not suddenly make it okay.  The inability to remember the event as an adult does not make the act that took place as a child, irrelevant.

"Not circumcising your son deprives him of a right of passage to becoming a man."
He's not a man.  He's a baby.  If he wants to get himself circumcised as an adult, that's his own business.  I doubt he will, though.  The average number of men who choose circumcision for themselves are 1 in 500.  Foreskin contains over 20,000 fine touch nerve endings, and feels GREAT to both him and his sexual partner.  He'll also probably not want to remove his eyelids either.  Just sayin'.

"Men complain so much, it's easier to get them cut as babies so we don't have to listen to them whine."
The inability to use language does not mean that the baby wants his penis cut.  He can't talk as an adult man can, so he will be unable to put into words his pain or fear.  But I assure you that a grown man will be in less pain than his newborn counterpart.  He will get powerful meds to deal with the after-pains of surgery.  He will also not have to be awake with next to no pain relief during the procedure.  He will not have to feel his foreskin being torn from his glans like a new baby does.
A grown man knows what he's getting into, and can give informed consent.  An infant is helpless and at the mercy of his parents.
If you think a grown man can't handle the surgery, how do you think a newborn baby can handle it? 

"My son will never get head if he's not circumcised."
How about you let your ADULT son make the choice for himself whether or not he wants to be circumcised.  If he really truly thinks he's going to be getting so much head if he's circumcised that he's willing to put his life and penis on the line for it, then at least it will be his OWN choice.
For the time being, when your son is an infant, how about you just worry about taking care of him and keeping him safe from harm.  No one is going to be giving him head for a very long time, so having foreskin isn't going to change that.
And I won't even get into talking about how disturbing it is for me when people talk about their infant son in a sexual way like this...

"I'm a Christian.  God wanted me to circumcise my son."
Yeah?  Where did it say that?  I'm confused, you see, because I know for a fact that God did not tell YOU to circumcise your son!  Sorry.  Here is a site that will explain it to you.  If that doesn't help you, there's THIS one.If that's not enough for you, maybe this will be:

The Bible says that God pronounced creation 'very good' (Genesis 1:31) and that humans were made in the image of God (Genesis 1:27). The Apostle Paul also said that God made every part of the body as he wanted it. (1 Corinthians 12:18).
"Behold, I, Paul, tell you that if you be circumcised, Christ will be of no advantage to you."  (Galatians 5:2)

"And even those who advocate circumcision don't really keep the whole law.  They only want you to be circumcised so they can brag about it and claim you as their disciples."  (Galatians 6:13)

What did Jesus think about circumcision?
His disciples said to him:  Is circumcision useful or not?  He said to them:  If it were useful, the father would beget them from their mother (already) circumcised.  But the one true circumcision in the Spirit has proved useful in every way.  (Thomas 53)

The Apostolical Canons of the Church state:
Canon XXII
"He who has mutilated himself, cannot become a clergyman, for he is a self-murderer, and an enemy to the workmanship of God."

Canon XXIV
"If a layman mutilate himself, let him be excommunicated for three years, as practicing against his own life".

Circumcision was practiced as a way to remove our own fleshly nature, which was fulfilled in the resurrection of Christ, and which the sacrament of baptism teaches us to look forward to in our own resurrection.
"Watch out for for those wicked men-- dangerous dogs, I call them-- who say you must be circumcised to be saved.  For it isn't the cutting of our bodies that make us children of God; it is worshiping him with our spirits."  (Phillipians 3: 2-3)

God doesn't make mistakes, and hasn't made a mistake giving EVERY healthy boy a foreskin.  Man's design will never be better than God's design, and it is only from self-pride, and ignorance, that human beings believe that cutting their newborn baby boy's genitals could possibly be what God wanted.  If God wanted baby boys to be without foreskin, they'd be born that way.  Don't fall for the lies and tricks told to you by people who are looking to make a very quick buck from the pain and mutilation of a perfectly functioning body part.

"He's MY son, so it's MY choice."

Well, if he's your son, for whatever reason it IS legally your choice.  But realistically, it's not your body and shouldn't be your choice to alter it for non-medical reasons.  Circumcision is an elective, cosmetic procedure.  Your doctor will tell you that.
No other cosmetic procedure can be done to an un-consenting do so is illegal.  By all rights, circumcision is an illegal procedure being practiced legally.  If your baby was born with a long nose, the Dr. and family members would look at you like you were crazy if you said you were going to take him in for rhinoplasty at 2 days old.
If your son decides for himself (as an adult) to be circumcised, at least he'll have been given the right to choose for himself.  

"I don't want my son to be a cheese-dick."

Classy.  If you can teach him to wash his hands and face, you can teach him to wash his penis.  And last time I checked, no one had to FORCE a teenage boy to touch his penis in the shower or tub.  Just tell him while he's at it, rinse it off, he'll be just fine!
This excuse actually says more about the parents than the child...they're assuming he'll be so stupid he can't manage to rinse off his own penis.  And that's sad, really.  I can't imagine being born into a family that, from the moment I'm born, has already decided that I will never be able to do basic things for myself, like washing my genitals.

"My best friend's neighbor's uncle died of penile cancer, so we circumcised him so he wouldn't get it too."
This year in the United States more than 1600 men will be diagnosed with breast cancer.  An estimated 500 men will die from it.  (Find more HERE.)

The most recent American Cancer Society estimates for penile cancer in the United States are for 2011: 
About 1,360 new cases of penile cancer will be diagnosed.  About 320 men will die from it.
As you can see, your son has a higher chance of getting (and dying from) breast cancer than he has of getting (or dying from) penile cancer.  I'm sure you're not going to have his breast tissue removed at birth to "prevent breast cancer", so to do the same with his foreskin to "prevent" a disease that affects less than 1% of men, is just madness!  If we removed every body part that "could" become cancerous in our lifetime, we would be left with little more than a pile of hair and fingernails.

Everyone is welcome to their own opinion about circumcision, this is a free country, and it's not illegal yet.  But they are NOT welcome to their own facts.  Sometimes the truth hurts, but it doesn't change the fact that it's the truth.

Never be afraid to tell the truth.  Even if your voice shakes.  Even if you're the only one speaking up.  After a while your voice will be strong, and your message will be heard loud and clear.  

1 comment:

  1. circumstupidity is a GREAT word. Going to have to steal that one! Wonderful post, by the way. :)